The Unexpected: Blogging for the sake of blogging.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Blogging for the sake of blogging.

Out of no where it just hit me. At 11:30 at night, when I am supposed to be in bed, on "bed-rest," it hit me. I should blog. About what? I don't know.. About who? I, again, don't know.

Maybe it's because my mind is in a fog and I usually feel much less stressed after I write. Maybe it's because things are again seeming like they can't get much worse, and I need to free my thoughts.. Who knows.. I sure don't.

I have been reading blogs all day it seems. Well actually for about a half hour now. And I had a thought cross my mind numerous times. I really am a terrible writer. Between the typo's and being so grammatically incorrect most of the time, and the fact that I can't help but drag anything out, I realized I will never have one of those popular blogs with thousands, or hundreds, or even ten's of readers. I will not have a blog which people just have to check daily. And, while that was my intention in the beginning, I am okay with that. I am totally okay with knowing I may be the only person who faithfully reads this ugly thing. Whatever. I am happy with it.
I like having something to look back at. Just like I enjoy reading my diaries and journals dating back to when I was a child, an adolescent, a teen.

Maybe one day, when I have had more time on this earth, and have accomplished more than just being a heroin addicted, suicidally depressed wife and mother, more people will come to read this. And if not.. Oh well. I am okay with it..

Maybe tomorrow I will blog about something worth reading.

Or not.

3 comments:

JoleneJuly 26, 2009 at 1:02 AM
I don't comment, but I always read <3 Hang in there Nicole.
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KarenJuly 30, 2009 at 5:22 AM
I always read too Ducks, you're a good blogger, i bet lots of people read it.
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BriAugust 1, 2009 at 5:34 PM
I think your a good blogger and I always read too!
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I am Nicole. I am a 24 year old SAHM to three wonderful children, Thomas, Collin, & Bailey. I am very happily married to the love of my life, Tom. Tom is 7.5 years older than me, but some how we were meant to be. We started dating sometime between March and May of 2000 and were married on May 7th, 2005. We are both recovering heroin addicts. I am attempting and struggling to lose weight. I wish it were baby weight but it's not. It doesn't help I have a terrible addiction to smoothies, ice cream, and Reese's.

This is my oldest son Thomas. He is 5. He started kindergarten this year. If he isn't in school, he is wanting to play video games. And if he isn't playing video games, it's because I got on his case. He loves learning. He loves imaginative play. And he still loves his mommy. And still gives kisses and hugs in public. Our only problem is his constant whining. And I mean constant. Speaking of, if anyone has any ideas to stop the whining, I'd be very grateful. Ignoring the whining is just not working.

My once silent little 2 year old. Though he is in speech therapy, and not everyone can understand him, he is the sweetest little boy. Until you tick him off. He has quite the little temper. He is a very independent little boy, usually found playing by himself. Every thing needs to be on his terms or you will get an earful. Even with his temper and his need for everything to be his way, he will stop whatever he is doing if someone is crying, hurt, or sad. He will come and offer kisses, hugs, smiles, and laughter.

My one year old baby girl. This girl is the funniest to those she is comfortable and seems like such high maintenance to those she doesn't see as often. Almost anything can get her lip to quiver and tears to fall. Even being as sensitive as she is, she loves to giggle and play. She is always stealing phones to say "'lo" and "buh" or the remote to switch channels anytime someone is paying more attention to the television than her. There are so many little things about her I love, but she hasn't quite found her place yet. My favorite time of day with her is right before nap time and when she does wake during the night to nurse. There is something about still breastfeeding her that makes me still feel she is an infant, instead of a toddling child.